Random Acts of Kindness (for jerks).

This week is Random Acts of Kindness Week. The Random Acts of Kindness Foundation hopes to “inspire people to practice kindness and to pass it on to others.” Good ol’ wiki describes a random act of kindness as a “selfless act performed by a person or persons wishing to either assist or cheer up an individual…. There will generally be no reason other than to make people smile, or be happier.”

This is insinuating that we perform these random acts of kindness because it makes the recipient “feel good.” And hey— when we make others feel good, we feel good, right? Well the truth is there are many other emotions that the recipient of a random act of kindness may feel other than “good”: suspicious, weirded out, and embarrassed come to mind. For example: One of the most common suggestions for a random act of kindness is to write a letter of gratitude to someone. I personally love handwritten letters. There’s nothing more romantic or exciting than a handwritten letter. But if I received a letter of gratitude from a friend out of the blue, my first thought would be Why are they thanking me and telling me that I’m a good friend? I should perform a suicide assessment just to be safe… Call me a cynic. Or a Jerk.

I’m generally kind to people. I say please and thank you. I smile at strangers. Sometimes during the holidays, I pay for the person behind me in the Dunkin Donuts drive thru. But I’m not kind enough to bake cookies for all of my neighbors or visit the elderly in a nursing home. Not yet anyway.

So in honor of Random Acts of Kindness week, I’ve compiled a list of “acts” for those people who aren’t used to going out of their way to be kind. If you’re a jerk the other 51 weeks out of the year, it might be hard for you to dive head-first into the random acts of kindness schtick. I understand. Here are some ideas to help you ease into the kindness.


Buy a beer/shot for someone at the bar
When was the last time you bought a beer for a stranger who you weren’t trying to pick up (and make-out with)? Go ahead. Buy a beer for the lonely old man at the end of the bar. Don’t worry about promoting alcoholism. You don’t even have to acknowledge that it was you. You’ll either make his day, or make him extremely suspicious. Either way, you win.

Let someone merge in front of you in traffic. During rush hour
If you experience moderate to severe road rage like me, this is going to be a tough one. But in reality, letting one car merge in front of you takes little to no effort. Just take a deep breath. You’ll be home soon. And if you’re lucky, you’ll get a thank you wave.


Be a parking meter fairy
Put a quarter in an almost expired meter. This is for you rebellious types. I think it’s illegal to do this in most cities. Australia seems to have the right idea though.


Leave some reading material in the public bathroom
Admit it--You’d be so pumped if someone left you a little dose of entertainment in the office bathroom. Leave a newspaper or magazine draped over the stall. Heck, if you’re the creative type you can even write a poem and tape it to the door. Nobody will have to know it was you and you can sleep easy knowing you made someone’s public bathroom excursion a little more enjoyable.


Share your awesome taste in music
Remember all of those mixed CDs you made back when illegally downloading music was all the rage? If you’re like me, all of that music is now on an iPod. No use for those old discs? Leave one in a favorite spot: coffee shop, library, etc. Label it with a sharpie or attach a post-it stating: For someone interested in really good music, or For someone who’s heart just got stomped on or For someone who just can’t get enough of 90s boy bands. Ya know- depending what’s on the CD.


Being kind is easy. And who cares if the recipient is suspicious or freaked out by your random act. More than likely, he’ll forget about it in a couple of days.

Happy Random Acts of Kindness Week. Let’s spread the love and attempted un-jerkiness